it's funny

to say this but i think it's a combination of everything in my life and all the things that have been going well and my slow, painful, gradual development of my inner self throughout the years that have led me to this point.

i've been feeling a myriad of emotions lately. and at times i am conflicted and question myself (though never as strongly as i once did a few years ago... i think i have a better sense of self now). just now i found this post on quora, and it's made me feel that i've really opened my eyes

https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-advantages-and-disadvantages-of-being-too-nice-to-people

Here's a story that will answer your question:

Put a frog in a vessel of water and start heating the water.
As the temperature of the water rises, the frog is able to adjust its body temperature accordingly.
The frog keeps on adjusting with increase in temperature...
Just when the water is about to reach boiling point, the frog is not able to adjust anymore...
At that point the frog decides to jump out...
The frog tries to jump but is unable to do so, because it has lost all its strength in adjusting with the rising water temperature...
Very soon the frog dies.
What killed the frog?
Many of us would say the boiling water...
But the truth is what killed the frog was its own inability to decide when it had to jump out.
We all need to be nice to people and adjust with situations, but we need to be sure when we need to adjust and when we need to confront/face.
There are times when we need to face the situation and take the appropriate action...
If we allow people to exploit us physically, mentally, emotionally or financially, they will continue to do so...
We have to decide when to jump.
Let us jump while we still have the strength.

Source: A forwarded message on Whatsapp
EDIT: Based on the link in Keith Lea's comment, apparently the frog does jump out. Although the story no longer remains true, I still think that the story puts across the point very nicely.

i think this summarizes a lot of things that I have been trying very very hard to figure out the past few days.

i would say in my case, i don't think the frog dies necessarily. maybe the froggy is dying on the inside, and he turns into a miserable old crank that no one wants to be around, and the froggy can't understand why because he's the one trying so hard to adjust... i feel like i realize now that a lot of things in my life, i brought on myself.

and then the question is, after the froggy jumps out, if the boiling water drops to a comfortable temperature again, it's the FROGGY's responsibility to figure out whether or not it's a good idea to jump back in. and there's nothing wrong with the froggy if he's wary and decides not to. and there's also nothing wrong with the froggy if he decides to after all. for a froggy that hasn't really developed this ability well, even if he judges inaccurately, it is all a learning experience... and day by day, month by month, the froggy will get better at it

:)



(as for me, i'm an overheated froggy. first priority is to cool off and get some cold packs so i don't get heatstroke and die, and then once i'm a normal froggy again i'll think about what to do :p)